When you're in school you know exactly what you're going to do. Year 9 is followed by Year 10 and before you know it you're 17 and expected to know what you want to commit at least 3 years of your life to. I went to a very good school where not going to university wasn't really an option. 90% of my year ended up going and I'm pretty sure most of us went to our first choice university. In the end I spent four years studying French and English Literature in Cardiff. I enjoyed it at first. Going to university after boarding school is very liberating and I wasn't much of a rule breaker in school so being of legal drinking age and being an 'adult' really meant that I could do what I wanted. I really began to grow and become my own person at my pace, doing things I wanted, or not.
Then for my third year I went to France on my year abroad. Whilst in hindsight my blog paints a great picture of what I did it wasn't an amazing experience for me. Oh the deceiving internet. My year abroad just wasn't for me, it didn't have the life altering effect that I was waiting for. I came back to Cardiff to start my fourth and final year and I really lost any motivation, interest and passion in either of the subjects. I didn't put much effort in. I wasn't even sure I was going to get the degree results that I needed to even pass my entire degree. Again with hindsight and I can see that I had a lot going on in my personal life that was draining me and putting a lot of mental strain on me.
Everyone always says that your early twenties and undergraduate years are the best. But being honest, my undergraduate wasn't the best time of my life in hindsight, this year has been. Your early twenties are messy and chaotic. You make mistakes, sometimes big ones, you attach yourself to people who you shouldn't and you stick by them for too long. I know I'm only 23 so I probably still count as early twenties but ever since I started this new chapter of my life I feel like I have become a whole better person. I'm not the person I want to be yet but seriously, who ever is?
"Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end."